Ok, I'm buying some new towels ! The question is, what brand, my little bed, bath and beyondettes? The last time I bought towels, I just picked out a color that matched the bathroom and paid the lady. I am now aware that "quality" should have been one of the determining factors. The only name I know that manufactures towels is Canon and they spend more time on their cameras and electronics than they do on their towels , (I know, I know! Just a feeble attempt at humor. Stay tuned, it gets worse). Any suggestions ?
Virgie Arthur is trying to block Larry Birkhead's move to take Dannielynn to the U.S.A. unless Birkhead agrees to share guardianship with her. Arthur, a charter member of the A-list, also wants sole guardianship if Birkhead dies while the baby is still a minor (Right ! With $400 million in her hands if Larry "accidentally" dies?). It seems a little strange because the Bahamian judge has already said he would probably allow Birkhead to take the baby to the U.S. provided he returns for the formal custody hearing scheduled for June 9th. Although I kinda wished that there'd be no candidates for this week's "Cat Ass Trophy", inevitably someone throws their proverbial hat into the ring.
Speaking of trophies, I saw a man showing his friends a picture of his "trophy wife". Apparently it wasn't first prize.
The Pictures: Elvis Presley, today's featured artist.
This Date In History: 1898; Spain declares war on the United States, an ultimatum to withdraw from Cuba , 1916; Irish nationalists proclaim Ireland an independent republic in the Easter Rebellion , 1981; IBM introduces it's first personal computer. One year later 5 million people sue IBM claiming carpal tunnel syndrome (I made the last part up).
Here's today's featured artist, Elvis Aaron Presley performong "Suspicious Minds".
Birthdays: Shirley MacLaine, actress and soothsayer (1632, 1745, 1815 and 1934). Barbara Streisand, actress and singah (1942).
The Hits Just Keep On Coming: A man purchased a new Lexus and returned to the dealer the next day because he couldn't make the radio work. The salesman explained that the radio was voice activated. "Watch this !", he said, "Willie Nelson !" and "On The Road Again" came from the speakers. Then he said, "Ray Charles !" and "Georgia On My Mind" played on the speakers.
The man drove away and after a minute, said, "The Beatles", and "She Loves You" began to play. Then, a carload of teenagers ran a red light and almost creamed his new car. He swerved and missed them, yelling out, "Assholes !"
Immediately, the French National Anthem began to play sung by Rosie O'Donnell and Jane Fonda, backed up by Al Sharpton on guitar, Larry "da judge" Seidlin on drums, Howard K. Stern on harmonica, Barbara Pelosi on tambourine, Debra Opri on sax, Virgie Arthur on drugs and Ted Kennedy on scotch.
That's it for today, my little towelettes. More tomorrow.
Stay Tuned !