May I Buy You A Drink ?

Friday has arrived and I'm ready to party somewhere! I wasn't able to go to AREA 51 on Wednesday and I'm getting cabin fever. It's a pretty good bet that I'll be heading over to Lakes Cafe and Pub or a reasonable facsimile for a little R&R.

         

With the economy the way it is, Lakes Cafe is still filling the place and tonight's karaoke night. You'd be surprised at the number of people who are bathroom singers and get up to give it their best shot. The only thing they forget is that there isn't 100 people at their bathroom concert and they get a little nervous.

If you've never performed before, it can be very disconcerting when you realize that there are people staring at you waiting to hear you sing. I've been performing for years and it never really bothers me any more. In fact, there are times that I go to the refrigerator, open the door and when the light hits me, I break into song.

Here's a shot of me a few year back performing at my brother-in-law's nightclub called Skywalkers.

                                   

Note the dark hair and that jacket I still wear today. It's from the Armani collection and it always worked well for me. Still does ! 

The CAT Award: There is one nominee as yet for this weeks Cat's Ass Trophy. The nominee is Josef Fritzl, nominated by Linda. This 73 year old Austrian man imprisoned his daughter for 24 years during which time, raped her continuously and fathered seven children.

Nominations are open until Monday at noon, so if a potential candidate surfaces (and you know one usually does) feel free to nominate.

Odds And Ends: Barbara Wawa announced yesterday that she had an affair in the '70s with a black senator, ostensibly because she's hawking the upcoming sale and release of her memoirs. Looking at her, that's about the best she could have done in the '70's. Charles Ray Fuller, an obviously brilliant, 21 year old man, forged and tried to cash a check for 360 billion, that's billion, dollars in Fort worth, Texas. Tellers were immediately suspicious (duh) and immediately called for security. Fuller, who was also charged with carrying a concealed weapon and possession of marijuana, was arrested for forgery. I just have to show you this street monkey's mug shot.

                         

The Pictures: Today's pictures are rustic and rural, the type of picture I always try to add to my portfolio, when possible. As always, there's some cryptic and not so cryptic messages and hellos. You know who you are, and thank the lord for that, because I can't make it from the computer to the kitchen without forgetting my mission. 

This Date In History: 1519; Leonardo da Vinci, the great Italian scientist, sculptor and painter of masterpieces such as the Mona Lisa, dies in France. 1670; England's King Charles II grants a charter to the Hudson's Bay Company, giving it a trading monopoly and control over the region around Hudson Bay in North America. 1863; During the American Civil War, Confederate General "Stonewall" Jackson is accidentally shot by his own men at Chancellorsville, Virginia and dies shortly after. 1945; Berlin surrenders to Russian Allied forces after they stormed the German capital during World War II. Less than a week later, the war in Europe ends.

Birthdays: Catherine the Great, empress of Russia (1729), Theodor Herzl,writer, journalist and founder of Zionism (1860), Manfred Freiherr von Richtoven (The Red Baron). military aviator (1892), Lorenz Hart, lyricist (1895), Dr. Bemjamin Spock, American pediatrician and author (1903).

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: The first story was provided to me by my pal, Garnett. I do not know if it's a personal account <grin>.

After retiring, the man went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked for his driver's license to verify his age. He looked in his pockets and realized he had left his wallet at home. He told the woman he was sorry but he'd have to go back home and would return later.

The woman then said, "Unbutton your shirt." So the man unbuttoned his shirt revealing curly silver hair. The woman said, "That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me" and processed his Social Security application.

When he got home, he excitedly told his wife about his experience at the Social Security office. His wife said, "You should have dropped your pants, you might have gotten disability too."

George Bush and Dick Cheney were sitting in a restaurant discussing the upcoming elections. When the waitress came to take their orders, Cheney said, "I'll have the steak." When the waitress turned to Bush, he said, "I'll take the quickie." Cheney motioned for the waitress to come closer and whispered into her ear, "He means the quiche."

A young Indian boy was curious and asked his father why Indians have such long names. His father put his arm around the little boy and said, "When an Indian child is born, the father immediately goes outside and names the child after the first thing he sees."

The father continued, "When your older brother was born, I went outside and the first thing I saw was large hawk flying high in the sky and we called your brother, 'Hawk That Soars.' When your sister was born, I went outside and there, beside the river, was a beautiful deer. It ran away as soon as I saw it and we called your sister, 'Running Deer', but tell me, 'Two Dogs Humping', why do you ask?"

That's it for today my little gunslingers. Have a safe and great weekend and more on Monday.

Stay Tuned !

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