Saturday, June 2, 2007

We've Got A Winner !

Selecting the winner of this week's "Cat Ass Trophy" really didn't take much thought, especially after reading your comments and emails. Co-judge, Shithead, and I have listened to and weighed your input and decided that this week's winner is "TB Man", the selfish bastard who exposed a number of people to the most contagious and incurable strain of tuberculoisis known to man. The Atlanta attorney has apologized, as many people are wont do, once exposed (you'll pardon the pun). If I were to rule on a form of punishment, I'd have him share Paris Hilton's jail cell during her incarceration, but I'm not sure who would infect whom.

The "Duck's Ass Award" for this week's runner-up goes to (A) Debra Opri, who, by the way, was served last evening with a law suit from Larry Birkhead's new attorney for pilfering $650,000.00 from Mr. Birkhead. Tag, Debby, You're it ! 

AREA 51 REPORT:  Krystel's was alive with birthday parties last evening, mainly Maritza's party (there was another birthday party for some guy, but, you know me). I was a little concerned that the constant drizzle might dampened the spirits, but rain doesn't damage alcohol, it just dilutes it. Nice to see Barbie and Jennifer last night, especially Jennifer. I haven't seen her for a number of weeks. My buddy, Vegita had his hands full with three, count 'em, three ladies at his table. I tried to bribe the busboy to help out working Vegita's table, but I was told to go to the end of the waiting line of volunteers. Me and Rodney Dangerfield, no respect ! 

The Pictures: I'm going to have to pin a note to my jacket, reminding me to snap some pictures at Krystels. Since my mind has the memory of a mirror, I think this is the only answer. Meanwhile, the "usual suspects".

This Date In History: 1883; PresidentGrover Cleveland marries Frances Folsom, 27 years his junior, becoming the first president to marry at the White House. 1953; Queen Elisabeth II is coronated in Westminister Abbey after succeeding her father, King George V1, to the throne. I have been on the throne on many occasions, but never crowned.

Birthdays: Marquis de Sade, writer and one kinky fellow (1740), Hedda Hopper, gossip columnist (1890).

Odds and Ends: June 1st marked the 40th anniversary of The Beatles album "Sgt Pepper". June 2nd marked the rebirth of Jimmy's body, which was slightly damaged last evening while dancing longer than his body parts could withstand.

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: Thanks to my sister, Jeanne !

 YOU KNOW YOU'RE LIVING IN THE YEAR 2007 WHEN: 

1) You enter your password in the microwave. 2) You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years. 3) You have 15 phone numbers for your four person family. 4) you email the person sitting beside you. 5) You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone's inside to help you carry the groceries. 5) Your reason for not keeping in touch with people is that they don't have e-mail addresses. 6) Every commercial you see on television has a web address at the bottom of the screen. 7) Leaving your cell phone at home, which you didn't have for the first 20 or 30 (or 50) years of your life, is cause for panic and a return trip to retrieve it. 9) You get up in the morning and go online before getting your coffee. 10)Your reading this and nodding and laughing. 11) Even worse, you know exactly to whom you're going to e-mail this. 12) You were so busy reading that you didn't notice that there was not a number 8 on this list. 13) Even worse, you scrolled up to check if number 8 was missing. 14) Go on, tell someone about this. You know you want to !         

That's it for today, my lttle chicklets. More tomorrow.

Stay Tuned !

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sounds like you had a lot of fun last night!  Glad TB man got the Cat Ass!  Hope you recover from all of that dancing, Jimmy.
Have a good night.
Pam

Anonymous said...

Thanks for giving jerk-wad the cat=ass award... he deserves that and everything else he gets....  Glad to hear you had fun last night... Hope you and Ralph made it home in one piece...
Jackie

Anonymous said...

Your readers love you for giving the cat ass award to the TB toting idiot. Loved the pics as usual. The one with the storm was awesome! Great hits today, and yes I did scroll back up to see that the 8th one was missing lol! (Hugs) Indigo