Tuesday, August 26, 2008

There's A New Storm Abrewin'

Yesterday, I made a mental note to make all of my future daily entries at the usual time. This decision was made based on the numerous emails I received wondering why I had not made my daily entry. I'd like to thank everyone who was concerned about me, but every time I close my eyes, the image of a woman with an impatient look and a rolling pin pin in her hand comes into view. I have seen this look before and my past experiences tell me that my mental notation is an excellent idea.

John Pierce has to be the world's dumbest thief. When Paul Ives returned from work, he found Pierce hanging upside down in a broken front window. Pierce had attempted to break into Ives' home and got his foot caught while smashing the window with a hammer. Pierce hung upside down for about an hour before police and rescue workers freed him. He was still holding the hammer in his hand.

                  

Hurricane Gustav is lurking in the Caribbean and early indications are not good for the Gulf of Mexico. It's still a little early to predict exactly where it will make landfall, but I don't like the looks of the early projected track. The market is already reacting to the possibility of the havoc Gustav might wreak upon the Gulf of Mexico oil drilling platforms.

The Democratic and Republican Conventions are running for the next two weeks if you follow these circuses, you know that they will be long on rhetoric and short on substance. It's be bad enough that the media will be covering these two events twenty-four-seven, iterating and reiterating the same inane comments until one's nose and ears begin to hemorrhage. In addition, you have the delegate interviews.

Although the majority of the Democratic and Republican delegates are intelligent and well-meaning, you will also see some of the most stupid people God ever put on this earth. Inevitably the media will seek out these particular yoyos and interview them, ad nauseum.

I think that it's part of the media rules that every available media type is given a microphone and a cameraman to seek out the 73-year-old, beer-bellied yahoo with a straw hat containing 47 pounds of American flags, pinwheels and mudflaps.

Occasionally the correspondent will make an error and choose an intelligent, well-spoken delegate, but when the yahoos see the light, they overpower the normal delegate and once again jump into the spotlight. It's the American version of the running of the bulls in Pamplona, Spain.

These people are part of the decision makers that will decide the fate of this country for the next four years. Fortunately, the wiser delegates outnumber the yahoos, most of whom will not make it to the final vote due to excessive drinking and partying. Of course, there's always the ones who get gored or trampled, but that's another story. 

The Pictures: Sidewalk Art - Part Deux. More of artist Julian Beever's amazing artwork. I would be remiss if I didn't include the other two pictures of master thief, John Pierce. Look for these pics at the end of today's pictures.

This Date In History: 1883; The small volcanic island of Krakatoa in Indonesia begins to erupt. The eruptions, which destroy the island, cause tidal waves that kill thousands of people on the larger islands of Java and Sumatra. 1896; Armenians in Constantinople revolt against the Ottoman empire, leading to a three day massacre of more than 6,000 Armenians.

1920; Eight days after Tennessee becomes the final state to ratify the 19th Amendment to the Constitution of the United States, the amendment is formally adopted, giving women the right to vote. 1977; The province of Quebec, under the leadership of premier Rene Levesque, passes a law extending the requirements for the use of French as the province's official language.

Birthdays: Robert Walpole, British prime minister (1676), Antoine Laurent Lavoisier, French chemist (1743), Lee De Forest, radio pioneer (1873), Christopher William Bradshaw Isherwood, American writer born in England (1904), Ben Bradlee, newspaper editor 1921Geraldine Ferraro, politician (1935).

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that our government can track a cow born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she sleeps. They can also track her calves to their stalls.

Why is it then, that they are unable to locate 12 million illegal aliens wandering around our country? I think the solution is to give every illegal alien a cow.

                                                           Illegal

A beautiful young woman gets into an elevator on the tenth floor, smelling of expensive perfume. She presses the 50th floor, turns to an old Italian woman on the elevator with her and say arrogantly, "Giorgio - Beverly Hills! $100 an ounce!"

The old Italian woman reaches over and calmly presses every elevator button from the 11th to the 49th floor. She turns to the young woman, farts, and says, "Broccoli - Publix! 49 cents a pound!"

Once upon a time, a Prince asked a Princess "Will you marry me?" The Princess said "No."

...And the guy lived happily ever after and went fishing and hunting and drank beer all day, every day, for the rest of his natural days.

The End.

                           

That's it for today my little artichoke hearts. More tomorrow.

Stay Tuned !

10 comments:

garnett109 said...

Jimmy is there any reason why non of your pictures are showing up?

luvrte66 said...

I just saw on CNN that Gustav is looking to become a very serious storm, hitting landfall SOMEWHERE on the Gulf coast. I hope all will be safe.

Beth

bamawmn46 said...

Jimmy,
I just read garnett's comment and your pictures are showing up here in Alabama. Sorry garnett, must in sink with the storms or something. <grin>

I did watch, err, listen, to the Democratic convention for a while last night. My thoughts are: Carolyn Kennedy has every ounce of grace her mother ever had. Ted can still give a speech as well. After all, he is a pro...   Michelle Obama was every bit in control and a much better speaker than Nancy Pelosi (speaker of the house).  I will admit it was to much like a pep rally (of course) for me.

Jacqueline

lurkynat said...

wild
Hey I hope that storm does not reek too much havoc!
hugs,nat

rjsisti said...

Loved your entry and oh my......how I love Artichokes!  Hey, I'm Italian....didn't you notice by the map of Italy on my face!  LOL

I have no clue where you got your sense of humor darling but keep it coming!

Hugs, Rose

P.S.  I have friends of mine reading your blog and they are not AOL Journalers...just fans of yours because I tell them you are such a hoot!  They have been a bit shy leaving a comment on your Journal though.  I tell them....just say you are a friend of Rosesareread!

plieck30 said...

So thats who broke our barbed wire fence last night and we blamed it on a deer. Paula

salemslot9 said...

no pressure, Jimmy

lsfp1960 said...

I started to read this entry yesterday afternoon, but then decided I should go out and mow the back yard~which I did.  So here I am, the next day catching up.  I have found some interesting programs on other lesser channels during the convention.  I found a program on FOX called "Cheaters"...it was a hoot!.   Linda in WA

pm71blackfen said...

I just LOVE those pavement drawings, or should I say sidewalk?!  That upside-down thief in the window happened about five miles from where I live, they should have left him there overnight, still at least it gave a lot of people a good laugh!
Thanks for your comment on my journal by the way Jim! Love, Pat   http://journals.aol.co.uk/pm71blackfen/ramblings-from-pat/

jmorancoyle said...

    You know it amazes me that everyday, someone steps forward and pitches his try at a Darwin Award. You'd think these dumb people would do themselves in long before they get hung upside down while breaking in to someone's home.
Jude
http://journals.aol.com/jmorancoyle/MyWay