Jimmys Sings ?

It's Tuesday and I'm already getting the itch to head to AREA 51 for some socializin'. I had a lot of spare time on my hands today which will be confirmed by today's entry.

Many of you have asked me to post some of my songs in my journal. Others have begged me not to post my songs. In either event, I went to My Space karaoke today and recorded a song by Elvis Presley entitled "An American Trilogy." The results are not exactly what I wanted, but the limited recording sound and effects are not studio quality and I just left "close enough" alone.

You can hear the song by going to my sidebar under Favorite Sites and clicking the title. I'll be posting future recordings there for those of you who would like to hear them. I've had several other requests but the microphone didn't fit.

Vice President Dick Cheney, speaking to the National Press Club in Washington, made a remark which was quickly criticized by representatives of West Virginia.

Talking about his family roots and how he's distantly related to Barack Obama, the vice president noted that he has Cheneys on both sides of his family and, "we don't even live in West Virginia." Cheney subsequently apologized for his ill-advised quip.

While I feel the joke was harmless in nature and any state could have been inserted in place of West Virginia, I did some additional investigationabout West Virginian reactions on the Internet and found these stories:

Homer Cornpone and his wife were interviewed by the media as to his thoughts on the matter and he remarked, "These Washington homosexual communists don't know nothin' about our state and ought to keep their big mouths shut, ain't that right, Sis?"

After the interview, Homer was pulled over by a West Virginia state trooper for a traffic violation. The officer came to Homer and said, "Do you have any I.D. ?" Homer said, "About what?" Homer's wife didn't even remove the Marlboro from her mouth as she told the state trooper to kiss her ass.

The Pictures: The trials, tribulations and adventures of America's space shuttles.

This Date In History: 1937; American divorcee Wallis Simpson weds the Duke of Windsor, formerly Edward VIII, who abdicated the British throne to marry her. 1948; The Hale telescope, the largest telescope in the world at the time, is dedicated at Mount Palomar Observatory in California. 1959; Singapore gains its independence from Britain, becoming self-governing in the Commonwealth of Nations. 1968; Valerie Solanas, an actor and author of SCUM Manifesto. a pamphlet denouncing men, shoots and wounds artist Andy Warhol at his New York studio.

Birthdays: Jefferson Davis, Confederate president (1808), Charles Drew, physician (1904), Josephine Baker, American born French singer and dancer (1906), Allen Ginsberg, poet (1926), Larry McMurtry, novelist (1936).

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: Continuing with Monday's ramblings from comedian George Carlin, here's some more New Rules Part Deux:

Rule Six: I am not the cashier! By the time I finish sliding my card, entering my pin number, pressing enter, verifying the amount, deciding that I don't want cash back and pressing enter again, the little jerk who is supposed to be ringing me up is standing there eating my Almond Joy.

Rule Seven: Stop screwing with old people! Target is introducing a new redesigned pill bottle that's square, with a bigger label and the top is now the bottom. By the time grandpa figures out how to open thedamn thing to take his medicine, he'll be in the morgue. Congratulations Target ! You've just solved the Social Security problem.

Rule Eight: The more complicated the Starbucks order, the bigger the asshole! The guy who orders a 'decaf grande half-soy, half low-fat, iced vanilla, double-shot cappuccino with one sweet and low,' usually qualifies as asshole number one.

Rule Nine: If you ever want to be a credible adult and earn more than the minimum wage, don't pierce or tattoo every available piece of flesh on you body! If you do so, plan your future around the phrase, 'Do you want fries with that?'

Rule Ten: When I ask you how old your toddler is, I don't need to know the number of months. 'He's two,' will do just fine. He's not fine wine or aged cheese and I really didn't care in the first place.

Rex was feeling depressed over his having to wear the dog collar after the injury to his front paw.

                        

He was further insulted when he was informed that being tied to the front porch facing south-southwest, his dog collar was being used to pick up 55 channels for his owner's television set.

That's it for today my little tater tots. More tomorrow.

Stay Tuned !

Tags: JimSulliv3, Jimmy's Journal, pshemmingway, Jimmys AREA 51, Possums Journal, ham and cheese, Stay Tuned !, My Perfect Martini, Jimmys-MySpace, ham and eggs, Jimmys Pictures, Jimmys Journal, The Hits Just Keep On Coming