Thursday, January 10, 2008

Breaking News ! (Well, sort of..I'm late, but I have an excuse))

It may sound weird but every once in a while the gene pool runs amok. This is one of those cases that is difficult to comprehend. Since I'm aware that most of the street monkeys that commit crimes aren't too bright, I know that anything is possible. This particular incident is being referred to by the media as "A Weekend At Bernie's".

David Dalaia and James O'Hare pushed Virgilio Cintron's body from the apartment Mr O'Hare and Mr Cintron shared about a block away to Pay-O-Matic, a check-cashing shop. When they tried to cash his $405 social security check, the clerk, who knew Cintron, asked where he was. As they attempted to wheel the dead man into the check cashing shop, a detective who was having lunch next door, arrested the two. Cintron evidently died of natural causes and the pair were taken to jail. Occasionally, I visualize a law being enacted that requires the combined IQ of prospective parents to be above 80. This is one of the occasions.

My entry is late today because I decided to buy groceries at 6:00 p.m. This was not one of my better ideas, but I wanted to get it out of the way so that nothing interferes with my Friday agenda, which may require me to go undercover. I forgot that everybody and his uncle shops for food in the evening, a practice I have shunned for years. I also forgot that people drive grocery carts the same way they drive their automobiles.

I have a method to my shopping madness. I start at point one and and when I reach the end of the store, as far as I can tell, I'm finished. As I began, I saw an attractive woman talking on her cell phone as she shops. Following a quick review of her persona (no wedding ring, no sniveling little hangers-on, and no female diesel truck drivers hovering over her), I came to the conclusion that she was fair game.

She sees me looking at her (drat!) and smiles (ok, so far). I become aware of her conversation and is seems like she is talking to a female friend. Now, I am not one to gossip (hereinafter referred to as the "conversation"), but I love hearing it. Bottom line, I found myself intrigued with the "conversation" and found myself purchasing things in aisles I don't normally shop, just to stay abreast (you'll pardon the term) of the situation.

I ended up spending twice the amount I normally spend  while forgetting to buy half the things I normally buy. Unlike a soap opera, where you have to tune in tomorrow, The "conversation" she was having with her BFF ended quite nicely and I payed the cashier (by some stroke of magic, we ended up at the same cash register). As it turns out, during the story, she mentioned to her BFF that she was going out tomorrow night to, you guessed it, Lakes Cafe ! The lord works in mysterious ways.

The Pictures: The remainder of my newfound stash of pictures are here for your review. There's always a few of my crazy ones and as per my wont, some cryptic and blatant hellos. 

This Date In History: 1776; English political writer Thomas Paine publishes "Common Sense". It denounces monarchy and proclaims that "the cause of America is in a great measure the cause of all mankind." 1861; Florida Convention delegates in Tallahassee vote to secede from the United States. 1917; William "Buffalo Bill" Cody, American army scout and showman, dies at age 70. 1949; RCA announces the seven-inch, 45 rpm record. 1960; Marty Robbins holds the record for the longest playing number-one song in history, "El Paso", at five minutes, 19 seconds.

Birthdays: Ray Bolger, memorable actor who played the "Scarcrow" in the wizard of Oz (1904), Willie McCovey, professional baseball player (1938), Sal Mineo, actor (1939), George Foreman, heavyweight champion boxer (1949).

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: Puns III - Ya Gotta Love Em !

A bicycle can't stand on its own because its two tired. What's the definition of a will? (Come on, it's a dead givewaway!) A backwards poet writes inverse. In democracy, your vote counts. In feudalism your count votes. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion. If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed. With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress. When a clock is still hungry, it goes back four seconds. A grenade thrown into a kitchen would result in Linoleum Blown apart.

Airplane Etiquette

If you are on an airplane sitting next to someone who irritates you follow these instructions:      
   1. Quietly and calmly open up your laptop case.    
   2. Remove your laptop. 
   3. Start up    
   4. Make sure the guy who is annoying you, can see the screen.    
   5. Close your eyes, tilt your head up to the sky & move your lips as if you are praying  
   6.
 Then run this screen.
 
That's it for today my little brandy snifters. More tomorrow.
 
Stay Tuned !

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh, Jimmy...you scored...well not yet, perhaps tomorrow!  Conversations only women can have...I'll be you even went down "that" aisle!  Hope you didn't buy any :)
xoxo ~Myra

Anonymous said...

So from this entry I take it you plan on being at Lakes Cafe Friday evening, to see if this, no wedding ring, no sniveling little hangers-on, no female diesel truck drivers hovering lady shows up~am I correct?  Best wishes, Linda in Washington state  

Anonymous said...

jeeze jim i hope you weren't in the ladies aisle buying summers eve?

Anonymous said...

Dear God, I'll never be able to think of casual Friday in the same light again.  Clicked on the link and saw the count-down.  haaaaaaaaaaaa    Anne

Anonymous said...

Good luck at Lakes Cafe!

Beth