The Agony Of Prison Life - 82 Minutes In Jail !

Nicole Richie served 82 minutes in jail for DUI. 82 minutes ! If I run a yellow light, the cops shoot out my tires and Richie gets 82 minutes? Is this a great country or what? We've got the best politicians, attorneys and judges that money can buy !

I have to show you her two photos that were taken when she was booked into jail. This is definitely not the photographer that takes pictures for your drivers license at the DMV. Isn't it amazing how the poses are so unrehearsed. Where was this photograher when Nick Nolte and James Brown were booked ?

                  

It kinda makes you want to have a cocktail, so I'm going to to AREA 51 at Lakes Cafe and Pub for Happy Hour ! I was going there anyway, it's just that having a pseudo reason for going sounds better. At any rate, we're having karaoke tonight, so join us.

The Pictures: Clones ? What if you could combine a few animals and make a new one of your own. That's just what we have today. I liked 'em when I saw 'em. I've got a few ideas for some actresses, but Shirley I digress (You said it, Surely !). I've included a baby macaque and it's mom taken in Thailand.

This Date In History: 1572; King Charles IX of France, under the influence of his mother, Catherine de Medicis, orders the mass killing of Hugenots (Protestants, as they were known in France), in the St. Bartholemew's Day Massacre. Authors note: My maternal (many greats) grandfather, Leonard Dozier, a hugenot, left France and came to America in 1683 to Virginia. 1814; In the last days of the War of 1812, British forces invade Washington, D.C., where they set fire to the Capitol and the White House. 1984; Baseball commisioner A.B. Giamatti suspends former star player Pete Rose for life for gambling on baseball. 1992; Hurricane Andrew devastates South Florida, causing 20 billion dollars in property damage and killing 41 people (I was there, went through that).

Birthdays: Rene Levesque, Quebec premier (1922), Cal Ripkin Jr., baseball player (1960).

The Hits Just Keep On Coming:

The Secret Of The Mysterious Dot: Most people think the the dot often seen on Hindu women comes from religion. The truth is it comes from marriage. When a Hindu woman gets married, she brings with her a dowry.

On her wedding night, the husband scratches off the dot to see if he has won a convenience store, a gas station, a donut shop or a motel. If nothing is there, he must take a job in India answering telephones and giving technical advice.

The kids filed into class Monday morning. They were excited about their weekend homework assignment, which was to sell something and then give a productive talk about salemanship.

Little Anne went first: "I sold Girl Scout Cookies and I made $30", she said very proudly, "I appealed to my customer's civic spirit and that'swhat made me successful."

Jackie was next and she said, "I sold my students' class pictures and I made $45. My sales point was how easy it was to get the pictures completed and how much the parents and friends would enjoy the pictures."

Little Jimmy stood up next and dumped a stack of cash on the teacher's desk. "$1,467", he said. "$1,467", cried the teacher, "What were you selling?".

"Toothbrushes", said little Jimmy.

"Toothbrushes?" echoed the teacher, "How could you possibly sell enough toothbrushes to make that much money?"

Little Jimmy replied, "I found the busiest corner in town. Then, I set up a chip and dip stand. When customers came by, I gave them a free sample. They all said the same thing, 'This tastes like shit'. I said, 'It is shit, wanna buy a toothbrush?"

That's it for today, my little sparrows. More tomorrow.

Stay Tuned !