Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Hump Day Is Here ! Hump or Drown ?

Well, it's hump day and the natives of AREA 51 will meandering toward Lakes Cafe and Pub for rest and recreation. Danny's weekly dart tournament is gathering steam and I'm sure the place will be packed. There's always room for more, so stop by.

If you don't understand the meaning of today's subject headline, you need to read yesterday's "Hits" to decide which fork in the river to take.

Jackie has nominated the Mattel Company for the Cat's Ass Trophy (CAT) Award. After thinking about it, I don't know why I didn't nominate them, but I defintely second the nomination. It seems to me if Mattel had their products manufactured and assembled in America, we wouldn't be having this lead paint problem in children's toys. Let the Chinese play with their own toys !

I was watching a news program about playgrounds the other night and they showed a fire that started in a pile of woodchips, evidently by itself. Supposedly, they'll replace the woodchips with gravel. While looking at the different things that were in the playground, I noticed that the playground was a lot different than our playground when I was young.

I didn't see the merry-go-round that we had in our park, the sole purpose of which was to make you throw up. If you didn't get sick, all your "friends" would keep spinning the damned thing so fast that your only option was to bail, which usually meant landing in a sticker patch. If you don't know what a sticker patch is, you probably played at the McDonalds playground.

In the program I was watching, the sliding boards were made of plastic. Ours was made of metal, which means two things. You didn't get on the slide at mid-day and you defintely didn't wear shorts.

And where are the teeter-totters and monkey bars? There was always the chubby guy, who would sit on his end of the teeter-totter, leaving your end in the air and then refusing to get off.

The monkey bars? All metal, always hot and little puddles of blood on the ground where some idiot slipped while trying to impress his girlfriend and did a one and a half off the top, usually drawing a round of applause from the unimpressed.

This leads me to the most horrifying of all, the swings. Why do parents think little kids like to be pushed so high that the fear of God enters into their tiny little bodies and lending thought to the idea of becoming a priest. If you were stupid enough, the next trick was to swing by yourself real high and then jump out. I did that trick once. Once ! They just don't make playgrounds like they used to, mostly due to the fact that there were few survivors !

The Pictures: Signs that you wouldn't want to see ! The Shuttle astronauts, one of the "pilfered pictures" from Indigo's site, a brand new baby anteater, Jackie's sunflowers and the "usual suspects".

This Date In History: 1935; Humorist will Rogers and aviator Wiley Post are killed when their plane crashes in Alaska. 1939; The film version of "The Wizard of Oz", starring Judy Garland, has it's premiere in Hollywood, California. 1944; Indian independence from Britain is proclaimed, with the former colony partitioned into the two nations of India and Pakistan. 1969; The opening day of Woodstock Arts and Music Fair in upstate New York. Overwhelmed by the hundreds of thousands in attendance, promoters decide to waive admission fees.

Birthdays: Napoleon I, emperor of France (1769), Ethel Barrymore, actress (1879), Oscar Peterson, jazz pianist (1925).

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: Sometimes a graphic can much better describe how one's day goes when one is behind.

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That's it for today, my little sugar cookies. More tomorrow.

Stay Tuned !


ksquester said...

OK, I am admitting that I look forward to your entry everyday. Mainly because I know what you are talking about. Example: childrens playgrounds. I remember wearning shorts on the about burned butt!  Now it seems that I am living at somewhere over the rainbow! The good thin is that I have a pass from the wizzard.   Anne  a.k.a. Mrs. Jones

ksquester said...

ONE more thing.............I know about "h"ump or drown and it's funny!!!

bamawmn46 said...

Happy Hump Day, Jimmy!!!  Thanks for 2nd-ing the nomination.... This is the type of things that will bring jobs back to America and I am an American. I have kids in my class that work at sheltered workshop that need jobs. Charity (and jobs) begin at home!!  Thanks for the flowers Jimmy!!!

rdautumnsage said...

It's a sure fire vote, I'm giving it the 3rd nomination which in fact makes Mattel the winner of the Cat ass award. With unemployment at an all time high, Americans could of used the work the factories here would of provided. I'm at the point right now of saying close our borders to Chinese made products. Hasn't this year taught anyone , anything? You and I had the same playground dear heart. With the difference being the ignorant idiots usually built it on asphalt. And they wonder why so many of us kids skinned and broke our bones. It used to be a sign of a playground warrior wearing badges of skinned knees and elbows. (Hugs) Indigo