Saturday, August 18, 2007

Mattel wins the Cat's Ass Trophy Award !

There wasn't much discussion when I met with Shithead (my cat and co-judge) as to the winner of this week's prized Cat's Ass Trophy (CAT) Award. Mattel, the toy making giant who obviously doesn't give a damn about the people who purchase it's products, wins the CAT Award. Perhaps we can get Mattel's Chinese painters and packagers to design and produce the new Mexican Hersheys candy and wrappers so we can distribute them to our daily stream of illegal aliens that enter our borders.

Last night's meeting of the socially impaired embibers at Lakes Cafe and Pub went well with no injuries or mishaps. My pals, Emilio, Mario, Hector and Lourdes, Rosie, and Vega served as ambassadors of AREA 51 and did so quite well, I might add. Danny completed another section of the new bar and when that bad boy's done, it's going to be nice ! I ran into an old friend, Charlie C, who I went to high school with in 19%#.  All in all, the evening went well and, as always, I forgot to take pictures. What can I tell you !

The Pictures: A pair of newborn Persian leopards is the picture of the day. I had to run the picture of "Little Schnozzy", the baby giant anteater again just because he's cute. A few more baby animal pic's, a partridge in a pear tree (you're sick ! I know), and the "usual subjects".

You know of my hatred for the dreaded asparagus, but it dawned on me that, in the past, someone had to discover this vegetable and put it in their mouth. Just imagine finding asparagus, celery, cauliflower, rootabega or a turnip and putting it in your mouth for the first time. I can hear the conversation now.......

Great, great, great grandfather Jimmy I: "Hey honey, I just tasted this. Try it."

Great, great, great grandmother Jaime I: "It tastes like shit, but let's keep it in the family so that our future great great great grandson Jimmy the XX11 can eat it !

This Date In History: 1587; Virginia Dare, the first English child to be born in North America, is born to members of the Roanoke Colony on the Virginia Coast, whose inhabitants will disappear three years later. 1958; Published first in a banned French edition three years earlier, Vladimir Nabokov's novel "Lolita" makes it's first U.S. appearance. The book sells 100,000 copies in it's first three weeks.

Birthdays: Meriwether Lewis, explorer (1774), Roman Polanski, film director (1933), Roberto Clemente, professional baseball player (1934), Robert Redford, actor, film director and often mistaken for the renown journalist, Jimmy (1937).

The Hits Just Keep On Coming:  Thanks to my pal, Beverly ! 

Two elderly ladies, Maude and Mabel, were sitting outside of their retirement home, having a drink and a smoke, when it begins to rain. Mabel pulls out a condom, cuts the end off, puts it over her cigarette and continues to smoke.

Maude said, "What's that?" Mabel answered, "It's a condom. I use it so my cigarette doesn't get wet." Maude says, "Where'd you get it?" Maybel replied, "You can get them at any drugstore."

The  next day Maude goes into the drugstore and asks the pharmacist for a box of condoms. The pharmacist, a little embarrased, politely asked, "What brand would you like?" Maude said, "It really doesn't matter, Sonny, as long as it fits a camel."

That's it for today, my little doodlebugs. Have a nice weekend and more on Monday.

Stay Tuned !


bamawmn46 said...

You and Shithead made the right decision....  Love the joke!! Have a great rest of the weekend!!

rdautumnsage said...

Fit a camel indeed! Loved the pic's of the baby creatures. I happen to like aspargus. I have to admit it has to be cooked right or I won't eat it. (Hugs) Indigo