Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Three Blowhards - Gustav, Obama and McCain

Hurricane Gustav is thankfully playing itself out in the gulf region, leaving behind a lot of damage and plenty of water, but not much more. Of course, since 'tis the season, we still have Hurricane Hanna, who has been wandering like a drunken sailor in the Atlantic and newly formed tropical storm Ivan not far behind her. Additionally, tropical storm Josephine has formed off the African coast giving us plenty things to keep an eye on in the coming days.

The Media is driving me crazy with their presidential election coverage. I'm getting to the point that I don't care if they elect Sammy Davis Jr as president. Just do it and get it over with! Their non-stop coverage and re-coverage of the same inane bullshit is starting to make Billy Hays commercials a pleasant distraction. Their obnoxious reporters, especially CNN's Jack Cafferty, are always asking the same stupid questions over and over.

The current word of choice is "vetting," a word that I had heard very little in previous year's coverage and now it's said a thousand times a day. It like the little child who discovers a bad word and once mastered, he uses it every day, ad nauseum.

The new subject is the choice of Sarah Palin as the vice-presidential nomination. The air waves are full of these reporters asking the vexing question, "Who is Sarah Palin and what qualifies her as vice president?" Although it's an excellent question, it's a question these assholes should have been asking of Barack Hussein Obama-Lama-Ding-Dong from day one. The reason it has not been asked is because we have to tread lightly and be politically correct, so that we don't hurt anyone's feelings and be labeled racists.

That subject notwithstanding, they're now concentrating on Palin's daughter, who happens to be pregnant out of wedlock. Uh, it's 2008 people, give the kid a break and move on. There are a lot more important issues that still have not been addressed, the main one being that neither candidate has submitted a written plan explaining exactly what they intend to do if elected. It really doesn't matter when you get right down to it because as long as we have a do-nothing Congress, ol' Sammy Davis Jr., could preside from his grave and still accomplish the same thing. 

The Pictures: Thanks to brother, Kirt, for these birth to flight, chronological pictures of two baby hummingbirds, taken between February 8, 2005 to March 9, 2005. These amazing pictures were taken with a Panasonic DMC FZ20 camera with a 12X zoom lens, creating little or no stress to the nesting mother. As a point of reference, keep in mind that these eggs are smaller than two tic-tacs and the opening of the nest is smaller than a quarter.

Obviously, I would be remiss if I didn't include some additional avian etchings for your review and amusement. 

This Date In History: 1666; The Great Fire of London starts in a baker's shop. The fire devastates the city, destroying many buildings, including Saint Paul's Cathedral and the Guildhall. 1864; Union armies led by General William Tecumseh Sherman occupy Atlanta, Georgia. They will burn much of the city beginning their march to the Atlantic ocean.

1945; On board the USS Missouri in Tokyo Bay, Japanese officials make their formal surrender to the United States, ending the conflict between the two countries in World War II. 1945; Viet Minh forces, led by Ho Chi Minh, declare the independence of Vietnam from France, beginning an eight-year colonial war that will result in a portioned country.

1969; Ho Chi Minh, leader of North Vietnam and architect of Vietnamese independence, dies at the age of 79.

Birthdays: Liliuokalani, Hawaiian queen, sister of Kamon Eyewana Laya and Lakanooki (1838), Al Spalding, baseball pitcher and manufacturer (1850), Romare Bearden, artist (1912), Christa McAuliffe, astronaut and teacher (1948), Terry Bradshaw, football quarterback (1948), Jimmy Connors, professional tennis player (1952).

The Hits Just Keep On Coming: Thanks to my pal, Garnett, for the following story.

A man walks into a restaurant with a full grown ostrich behind him. The waitress asks them for their orders. The man says, "I'll have a burger and fries." The ostrich says, "I'll have the same." After they finish their meal, the waitress brings them a check for $9.40. The man reaches into his pocket, pulls out $9.40 and pays the bill.

The next day the man and the ostrich come in again. The man says, " I'll have the burger and fries." The ostrich says, "Me, too." When the waitress brings the $9.40 check, the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out exactly $9.40.

This routine continues for the week and on Friday, when the waitress sees the two again, she says, "The usual?" The man says, "No, today I'll have a steak, baked potato and a salad." The ostrich says, "I'll have the same thing." After the meal is finished, the waitress brings a check for $32.75 and the man reaches into his pocket and pulls out theexact amount and pays her.

The waitress can no longer contain her curiosity and says, "How is it that you always have the exact change in your pocket?" The man says,"Several years ago, I was cleaning my attic when I found an old lamp. When I rubbed it, a genie came out and gave me two wishes. My first wish was that if I ever had to pay for anything, all I had to do was reach into my pocket and the exact amount of money would always be there."

The waitress says, "That's brilliant! Most people would wish for a million dollars, but you'll always be rich for the rest of your life. So, what's with the ostrich?"

The man sighs and says, "My second wish was for a chick with a big ass and long legs who agrees with everything I say." 

                         

That's it for today my little whip or wills. More tomorrow.

Stay Tuned !

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

I thought hoover blows but I found out it sucks, ivan is actually ike i think?

Anonymous said...

Cute story! Thanks Garnett!

I like Sarah! She qualifies because she has real-life problems! Unlike others out there trying to cover stuff up!

Jackie

Anonymous said...

Just popping in to say thank you for stopping by with birthday wishes for me today!
Martha :-)

Anonymous said...

The hummingbird pictures are awesome! I'm not sure about the old ladies giving "the bird."  I was proud of Ombama when asked about Ms Palin's daughter...he said something to the affect "it's a private family matter~leave them alone."  I'm writing your name in on my ballot. Hehehe~you, Garnett & Johnny Walker should be able to solve the problems of the country. Linda in WA    

Anonymous said...

Did you mean tropical storm Ike and not Ivan?????

Love the pictures.  Your brother is a great photographer!

Vetting!

Hugs, Rose



Anonymous said...

The Hummers are amazing!! GREAT shots! Enjoyed your joke...and also enjoyed your political views.
Pam

Anonymous said...

Jimmy,

Actually, Barack Obama has a detailed, 60-page outline of his policy for when he takes office in January. You can find it at barackobama.com.

Happy reading! <grin>

Beth
http://journals.aol.com/luvrte66/nutwoodjunction/

Anonymous said...

Now THAT is a great joke.  This election is driving me crazy.  I can't wait til it's over.   Anne

Anonymous said...

I know do you think we will survive til november ugh
hugs
Sherry

Anonymous said...

The pics made me smile.  And a big thanks for stopping over at Martha and Dad's place!!

Nancy

Anonymous said...

Interesting humming bird pictures. They always arrive here on March 15th and leave in September or October. I'm not saying who I'm for politically but I wish they would let Mrs. Palin's daughter alone. She sure isn't the first girl to get pregnant and not married. Paula

Anonymous said...

Fantastic photos Jimmy, such close-ups! What is it that's lining the bird's nest? It looks like cotton wool! ~~ Pat   http://journals.aol.co.uk/pm71blackfen/ramblings-from-pat/

Anonymous said...

Kamon Eyewana Laya?
wonder if her family
is still greeting people
at the airport with
leis and kisses
on the cheek
lol

Anonymous said...

Dear Jimmy
I love the part about USS Missouri in WWII wow! how do you find this stuff!:)
I'm tickled to death about what you wrote about the media
Wowee
give it a break people ; how about a few more facs about anyone's plans and how it might affect us?
Hey we could really use statistical guides about now!
no kidding!
Hey Jimmy! I even heard a few reporters complaining about the lak of substance in this mess! go figure!
hugs,nat