Mondays Make Me Stutter !

The weekend was great and filled with great television coverage of the Daytona 400 NASCAR race which was won by Kyle Busch. The race came down to a "green-white-checker" finish, some controversial moves and a last lap crash. The crash caused a controversial yellow flag and the questions that arose were as to when, and for which incident, the yellow flag should have been displayed.

Bertha is the name of the first hurricane of the season and although I could do ten minutes on the name itself, I'll reserve comment until she's passed my area.

The CAT Award had one nominee and a good nominee it was. Jude nominated the street gangs of Chicago's inner city who, during Chicago's annual two week food celebration called The Taste, managed to take their fight to the streets shooting four people, one fatally.

Personally, I'm pleased when the gangs shoot and kill each other, it's a win-win situation. The sad thing is when they take it out of their neighborhood and innocent bystanders are killed or injured. It seems that Chicago has all but thrown in the towel with its gang problems. The Cat's Ass Trophy goes the street gangs of Chicago.

Speaking of the Cat's Ass Trophy, I'd like to nominate FEMA for giving away 85 million dollars meant for the victims of Hurricane Katrina. CNN in Atlanta (also known as Detroit south) reported that goods, ranging from kitchen goods to sleeping necessities, sat in a FEMA warehouse for nearly two years. Oddly enough, I never hear any news about this in the speeches made by the two idiots running for president.

The TAC Award (Thanks Alot Citizen) is still being created and I'd like to find an icon that we could use. The basics of the idea (which my pal, Jackie came up with) is a antithesis to the CAT Award, in which one would nominate someone who did something good (and hopefully humorous as well). If you have an idea or a submission for an icon, please email me. I'm hopeful to get it rolling this week.

The Pictures: Animals with personality?

This Date In History: 1754; King's College opens in New York City under a grant from King George II. After the American Revolution it will be named Columbia University. 1946; Italian-born Mother Frances Xavier Cabrini is canonized, becoming the first U.S. citizen to become a saint in the Roman Catholic Church. 1969; The Canadian government, led by Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau, designates English and French as the official languages of the country.

1981; President Ronald Reagan nominates Arizona judge Sandra Day O'Connor to become the first woman on the U.S. Supreme Court. 1987; Former National Security Council aide Oliver North begins his televised testimony in the Iran-Contra hearings, testifying that he took no action that was not approved by his superiors.

Birthdays: Gustav Mahler, composer and conductor (1860), Marc Chagall, painter (1887), George Cukor, motion-picture director (1899), Satchel Paige, professional baseball player, who threw three scoreless innings of against the Boston Red Sox at the age of 59 (1906).

The Hits Just Keep On Coming:

Harvey was sitting on the porch outside his retirement home when his friend Murray came walking up with a big smile on his face. Harvey says, "So, what's with the smile?" Murray says, "I am so happy I can't begin to tell you." Harvey points to the chair beside him and says to Murray, "So, sit down and tell me."

Murray sits down, smiling from ear to ear, and exclaims, "I just got my new hearing aid. It is the newest thing on the market and I'm telling you, my life will be changing. I can hear a pin drop ten feet away."

Harvey says, "That's wonderful, what kind is it?" Murray looks down at his wristwatch and says, "Five o'clock."

One morning a blind bunny was hoping down the bunny trail when he tripped over a snake. The bunny said, "Please excuse me, I'm blind and I can't see."

The snake said, "That's ok, it was probably my fault, I'm blind as well. By the way, what kind of animal are you?"The bunny said, "well, I really don't know because I can't see myself. Maybe you could examine me and find out."

So the snake felt the bunny all over and said, "Well, your soft and furry, and you have a fluffy tail, so you must be a bunny rabbit."

The bunny said, "I can't thank you enough. By the way, what kind of animal are you?" The snake  said, " I have no idea", and the bunny agreed to examine him.

When he finished, the snake asked,"Well, what kind of animal am I?" The bunny said, "You're hard, you're cold, you're slimy and you have no balls..... You must be a lawyer."

                     

That's it for today my little roll excess. More tomorrow.

Stay Tuned !

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