This is the original Jimmy's Journal from AOL Journals with all entries archived since December 2006
Monday, March 17, 2014
A Saint Patrick's Day Wish
May you always have walls for the winds, a roof for the rain, laughter to cheer you, those you love near you and all your heart might desire. Of course, a fifth of Jamison's Irish Whiskey, wouldn't hurt.
Julius Caesar was romantically involved with Cleopatra for 14 years. But he never asked her to marry him. Cleopatra felt betrayed and spent years whining about it in public. That's why she was known as the "Egyptian Taylor Swift."
After he dumped Cleopatra, there were rumors that Julius Caesar fathered an illegitimate child by a housemaid. But those rumors turned out to be false. It was actually Caesar's cousin, Julius Schwarzenegger.
Laugh lines: Three kids were out riding their bikes one afternoon when a fire engine zoomed past with blaring sirens. The three kids noticed a Dalmatian on the front seat of the fire engine.
The first boy said, "They use that dog to keep the crowds back." The second boys said, "No, he’s just for good luck."
The third kid knew better. He said, "No, that’s not it. The dog is there to give them directions to the nearest fire hydrant!"
A country boy came home and found his house on fire. He rushed next door, telephoned the fire department and shouted, "Hurry over here. My house is on fire!"
The fireman replied, "Okay! How do we get there?" The country boy says, "Shucks, don’t you still have those big red trucks?"
That's it for now. Stay Tuned !
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